Decision Worth Pursuing For

If I base my identity on the Canadian psychologist James Marcia’s Identity Status Theory, I must belong to what he classified as Identity Foreclosure. That’s because I let my parents determine my own career direction. However, after I enjoyed this week and just before I close my eyes to sleep, there is one realization that came into my mind: there are decisions worth pursuing for.

Just last week, Central Mindanao University College of Veterinary Medicine hosted the 8th National Congress of Veterinary Medicine Students. With this year’s theme: Building Bridges for Excellence in Veterinary Profession Across the Archipelago, once again numerous aspiring vets from both private and state universities gathered. Representatives from 11 Veterinary Medicine schools across the country came and exposed their selves to new learnings, explored wider opportunities, and shared same fun experiences. The 4-day event was packed with talks from numerous respected veterinarians in various subfields of veterinary profession, tours to different vet facilities within and outside the campus, and fun moments at nights meant for students to socialize.

Even though I’m still in my last preparatory semester in this course, we sophomores were still allowed to participate in the said event. Honestly, being a ‘know-nothing’ yet in veterinary matters, I really hadn’t enjoyed the talk too much, but actually the whole thing stirred a question in my mind: is that really how big the opportunities that awaits for me?

When you come to think of it, there are only more or less 21 Veterinary Medicine Schools in our country, yet, the manpower demands for animal health care, for livestock, swine, equine and poultry production and sales, and for the academia are consistently high. Even the demand for veterinarians for abroad is always high too. These demands are always in need for a veterinarian’s skill. That’s the reason why even if a veterinary medicine graduate is not licensed yet, there are handfuls of companies which are reserving or even hiring him already. And I’ am even lucky enough to be enrolled in one of CHED’s only 3 Higher Education Institutions (HEI’s) recognized as Center as of Excellence in Veterinary Education.

How about in Bukidnon, is there really a need for veterinarians? The answer is a big YES. Actually, just last month, when I and my dad went to Onda’s Farm (just along the national highway situated in Dalwangan, Malaybalay) to buy some trays of fresh eggs, we had a short talk with its owner. We my dad told Mrs. Onda that I am studying Veterinary Medicine, she immediately told me that I will apply to her when I graduate for she doesn’t have one yet. We were just laughing after that for I still need to conquer 4 more years before I graduate. But that alone proves that there is really a great need for veterinarians in our province alone.

Studying this course isn’t easy at all. It’s even almost a miracle to see someone finishing it in CMU within 6 years! Imagine, just mastering several animal anatomies, studying wide range and differences of diseases among animals, and just the fact that animals as patients don’t even talk where the pain is (vets just got to know), aiming to be a great doctor is a tough fight. Yet seeing those aspiring vets like me inspires me a lot. They don’t strive just to earn money; they don’t strive just to get a stable job. They strive primarily because there is an urge within them that they want to help these helpless creatures, and that they don’t want to see any sad pet-loving kid. Though before, I didn’t wanted to be a veterinarian, I believe within me that animals are my comfort zone, and living in a ranch is my dream. This is not just a dream actually, IT’S MY PASSION. And now I know, this decision is really worth pursuing for.

Dance When Summer Rains

Dance When Summer Rains
Carl Ace R. Parilla

Can I ask you to dance when summer rains?
(When rains come rare like wolves at noon)
It could be tough but if your smile ordains,
My dear I'll hold your hands and I shall croon.

I'll hold you tight near me so you won't fall,
Your sweetest laugh will be our melody;
As I profess to you my pleasant call,
Hope you'll not turn me down so heartlessly.

But if you won't come and there's no more rain,
Maybe next summer you'll might give me chance;
My eyes for long would stare the window pane,
For long I'll wait until you come and dance.


Yes both the summer rains and you are rare
Yet still I'll wait for you for prize is fair.

*A Shakespearean(English) Sonnet written in Iambic Pentameter.

This is my first time to write a sonnet and observed the proper way of writing it. I'm just happy because even though I wrote way too far from Shakespeare did, I still made it in one sitting only. I studied how its done by reading some how to's in Google earlier. I find it funny because primarily, I planned to write a poem of same title in a freewriting manner, but I just don't know when it came into my mind to write a sonnet. I simply found myself searching in Google for instructions on how to write it.

Yes its not so flowered with beautiful metaphors and figure of speech, but I believe the poem would still stir some argument to a reader's mind. Why would he ask her to dance at summer rains when infact its rare? Why would he thinks it would be hard for him to persuade her to dance with him? The answers depends on you. :)

I hope you enjoyed this sweet piece of my literature. Feel free to comment and your advices, reactions, suggestions, especially your adorations are openly welcomed. Thank you!

The Beauty of Home

Gantungan Falls

There I lazily walk the green promenades:

From rainforest’s to cornfields’ esplanades

When I come to town the breeze that embrace—

Is the coolness that I miss at yonder days.

Impalutao, still a diamond in rough

Pristinely virgin; gorgeous than enough

Land of finest cowboys’ maiden soil;

A keeper of history that once a great turmoil.

There found rice and cane, and all the fruits it grows,

And all the stock and poultry farms in lush it holds

Gifts all its people a happy family living

Giver of jobs so we don’t need to strive far crying.

With beautiful waterfalls that God endowed,

And all the vistas that make me so proud:

It must be God’s dowry to men that grown,

Yet never forgotten to share memoirs of home.

Originally, I am not a native of this place, we just moved. As a child before, I believe I can appreciate the beauty of my new surrounding better than the busy old folks, and actually I really believe I viewed it so right: Impalutao is just perfect. Just at that right moment, the God's pristine paradise turned my 'citykid' soul into a 'native' soul. Besides, I'm so proud of it!

Impalutao is a barangay in the Municipality of Impasug-ong, in my dear agricultural province of Bukidnon. It is the only barangay in the municipality dubbed as "Philippines' Land of the Finest Cowboys" (i find it TRUE!) which both the school and the barangay hall are situated just along the national highway; thus, Impalutao is most accessible barangay of Impasug-ong.

It has a recreational area found there named CEDAR or Center for Development and Recreation. The area is a known venue for family gatherings, reunions, religious camps, and more. Found there is an ice-cold (truly ice-cold) spring and majestic waterfalls that would give you unlimited options to enjoy. Beauty of each waterfalls is unique from each other. Gantungan Falls is not the first one you'll meet when you get there, but is the first one that you would see, though. Its beautifully bounded by cliffs of rocks which was shaped by the water flowing there for thousands of years. Above it is a bamboo bridge, where a brave-spirited one could jump on straight down to the swim-able river(head of the falls, trust me, its not dangerous). Natigbasan Falls, this is the falls that you'll first meet. Though you cant see it directly(because the head of the falls is just beside of the path and not infront of the path), however you can trek your way down there. The path plunging down will never assure you a comfortable hike, but would surely give you a thrilling one. At the end of it, you'll have a great view of Natigbasan, and you can even go within the falls. WARNING: the water falling is really sharp, but its fun actually. Dila Falls is the most majestic one. Its easy to get there, but its quite far. Though tiring, the aimed traipse would promise you an alluring view you wont ever forget. There are 2 more falls, but I haven't known yet where to find the other one. I've reached one, but it was just last year that I ever learned that falls exists. I wont give a detail of that falls, but I assure you, that one could give you your most unforgettable waterfall jump. :)

I call my place as a DIAMOND IN ROUGH. Its a beautiful place, its not just a common barangay. However, the tourism industry was not so developed, that's why the place was still 'never-heard' to most people.

On the other hand, our barangay promises a great haven for Agriculturists and Veterinarians. Handfuls of established and internationally known plantations are found there. Dole Philippines and Del Monte Corporation-- just to name a few. Plenty of poultry farms and piggeries were scattered at the highlands. Plus the neighboring ranches and the Malaybalay Stockfarm, which the boundary of Impalutao and the the said stockfarm is just the national highway, just cross it! Not to mention, our barangay is known too for having a good deposit of mineral, Chromite.

Cool weather. Warm people. Peaceful place. Scenic paradise. Countless opportunities. Wide space for new neighbors. What can you wish for? Come and visit my hometown, Impalutao. :)

Natigbasan Falls

Dila Falls

rappelling at Impalutao

Vows and the Ring

A ring to a true lover is beyond a mere symbol of commitment. It is a vow of love until forever. It is a memento of the whole journey of one’s romantic rapport. But for a broken-hearted true lover, it is a reminder of a broken vow; a keepsake of a romantic journey-gone-wrong. Being one of the latter, that’s what I felt. Startlingly, you, my last lover proved me wrong.

I can still remember that night when you gave me this ring in my left hand. I can still feel the unforgettable bliss when you were right there infront of me, speaking your vows out of love while you were giving me the ring. Certainly, at that very moment, I imagined myself wrapped in your loving arms in the golden year of our marriage; like a happy paramour! But imagination stays fictitious as long as it stays an imagination; you certainly decided to make me miss that daydream of mine.

Yes ours was a journey in a rough road. It’s quite too short compared to forever, but we both know that we gambled to endure the struggles and challenges over this one strange love affair. Though ours was so happy - packed with numerous and exceptional chronicles of dates and strolling in the tune of our heartbeats - ours was also painful, embedded with tearful memoirs of misunderstandings and mistrusts. Yet we dared to keep our vows true till forever, but you gave up, and broke my heart.

Through the pain, I just cry at agonizing nights and face the day with a smile. I kept on denying the worst heartache of my life, thus, I chose to keep my thinnest string of chance with you. I kept on proving to you that I love you so much (and somehow I tried to do things that would make you regret if you totally abandon me), but I just end up tired.

We both know that what I only wish is to be with you even in your last year in college. So that it’s you that I will first give my smile in the day, and the last face I would see before I close my eyes. We are like that when we are still totally madly inlove, but you know that I didn’t wish that to repair our broken vows, I just wish to satisfy my heart that still screams your name.

Afraid that I might not fully give you the freedom that you want if I’m you stay with me; you fooled me and ruled my heart with your hoax reasons. Like a dumb, I thought those were true! I wept over and over again at nights that I miss you, and only this ring that you gave me is what I sleep with at those nights when I wish you’re here with me.

Sometimes, I just find myself staring at the ring, unconsciously reminiscing the days that we were like having the time of our lives. Yes, I just think that it is you hugging not just one of my fingers but my whole body at times that I can’t bear the pain of missing you anymore.

As the saying goes, no smoke will hide forever, and I learned your dirty secret. You saw me that certain night crying so hard in front of you. I cried not just because I lived in your lies but because I pitied myself too much of being a die-hard fool. Carried away by the pain that I’ve cried for, I gave back the ring to you and ask you to give it to the one who you will love for forever.

Stunningly, you received the ring with no regret. But later on, you cried. You that rarely cry cried. “I bought this ring from my own pocket to make you happy. That was real when I gave you my vow. I even had hard time wondering what the size of your finger is. When I went back home and lost my ring, remember, I asked mom to look for it and I wore it back. And now that we are not committed anymore, you still saw me wearing the pair of this one. Go to my room and you will see that I kept it.” Those lines that you spoke keep on hurling on my head for seconds until I was refreshed of the memory of that night when you put it to my finger.

I regretted that I surrendered the ring that reminds me that once in my life, someone truly loved me back. I almost forgot how happy I was realizing that someone and that someone was you, had accepted and loved me for all of me: with few assets and long list of insecurities. I know it’s weird, but at that very moment, all I wanted is to get the ring back.

Disappointed and hurt, like a heartless, you never pitied my embarrassing demand. I cried a lot but nothing changed. And it broke my heart when you threw the ring to the grasses. I cried more and kneeled infront of you, desperately begging you to help me look for it. But to my surprise, you pulled the ring from your pocket and put it back to my finger like the night you first did.

I cried leaning on your upper torso, and you just kept on saying

sorry while kissing my head. That very moment I know you still love me, but also at that time I know that I must accept it all and start moving on.

Comforted, we made new vows. I personally promised that I will not wish anymore to live with you for this last year of yours in college. You also promised not to lie to me anymore and you will try hard not to hurt me once again. But I still can’t deny that I love you still, so I asked you not to enter a new love affair as long as you are here in college because it would surely give me a pain that is synonymous to dying. You promised, not because you pitied me, but because you don’t want me to be hurt that much.

You proved me wrong when I thought that this ring is a reminder of a broken vow; a keepsake of a romantic journey-gone-wrong. You showed to me that this ring is a forever symbol of our love; our love that may not have a happy ending, but for sure will stay in our hearts so much deeper than fairy tales stayed on kids’ hearts.

Soon I’ll get over to this pain, I know. Time will come that I will forget all this heartaches. But for sure never will be the time will come that I’d ever forget you my last lover. As long as this ring will not turn to dust yet, the memories of us will forever be in my heart, just like our memories stay in your heart too.

What I Missed?!

Fieldtrip? It is a trip/tour on a certain place by a group of people (in this case, students) to learn the history and science behind it meant for widening one’s knowledge, and of course, to have fun. I repeat: TO HAVE FUN.

NOTE: This article is intended to wrap up the our fieldtrip in Butuan City and in a way, to give recommendations for you readers so that you wont miss a thing in your fieldtrips.

Our History 11 fieldtrip in Butuan City has been successful to its goal. It has made us appreciate how civilized Pre-Hispanic Philippines is, by giving us a view to the rich history of one of the country’s oldest settlement, Butuan. Its really amazing to ponder about the fact that once in the timeline, when Europe is experiencing Dark Age, uncentralized(barangays) and centralized(Sutanates) civilizations scattered in the Philippine Archipelago was busy enjoying its peak with the rest of the Orient. Evidences of rich culture and trade are really tangible in the excavated remains that were saved from the times that the Spanish conquerors forcibly destroyed these for them to easily control our rich lands.

However, personally, I know I missed a lot. Thus, I’m writing to save you readers earlier before you regret. Haha!

Fieldtrip is more than learning, its much more likely appreciation and having fun! But I forgot somehow to put this in my mind, so I really missed a lot. And now, I’m gonna recommend you to do the following to make your trip worthwhile:

Keep your fone away and keep your friends close. Every time you go down from your bus and roam the area, shut your fone. It is really not the time to entertain your friends afar or even your lover at that such time. Oh come on! They could have your time while you’re riding. Instead, gather all your pals and together, you enjoy the spot! Keep the cameras alive and capture every perfect moment. Remember, every word you type on your fone is one second or more wasted.

Don’t save your money for the mall. You might think of buying a shirt or a bag in the mall, which most likely be your last stop. You’re thinking that might cost half or even more of your allowance. Hence, at the whole trip, you have been the thriftiest you ever. Hello?! You can always go to the mall, or even in a department store to buy a shirt—anytime! Don’t make your self a poor guy in the whole trip, my dear. Buy souvenirs, buy local delicacies. For sure you would still have something left to spend for foods while strolling at the mall. Remember, malls are always there, but the chance to enjoy a certain tourist spot with your friends could be just once forever, so make the best out of it!

Never forget to include yourself in your pictures. Yah, you need to picture everything inside the spot for your report, journal, and the likes. But don’t forget to have a remembrance for yourself. Pictures of a tourist spot are always available on the internet, but a picture of a tourist spot with you and your friends won’t be in the net if you won’t capture one! So don’t waste your batteries taking different angles of an ancient Chinese plate, for example. Remember, isn’t it better to take different pictures of yours beside that plate? Haha!

These are just some of the recommendations I could give to you to ensure your happiness for the whole of your trip. The rest are just dependent on the capacity of your common sense. Remember, learning something about the place could be done over the computer, but having the chance to enjoy the place to the best way possible could only happen once, and never again. So don’t spoil your time taking the trip too educational, it’s not good to think that you did pay some bucks just to learn and learn when in fact you can do that at school. The keyword for a successful fieldtrip is: ENJOY!

Lust, As They Say

(A Fucking Friend's Cry)

"Here I am again. Caught up in a whirlwind of desire. All I want is to own you. Nothing less, but wishing for something more. Much more from you."

I must be blind. No, I'am really blind. Why? Because I'm so lost. Lost within the lustful spell of you. Now I'm a nomad of your every curve. A wanderer of your seductive nights. I've never been like this, never been insane like this.

Months ago, your just an ordinary face to me. Not even worthy of my "good morning!". But months earlier, you've change. No, you changed me. I've been a Carl who easily snapped your bait. Then you reeled. Finally, you got me. You got me unconsciously; and you got me happily.

I've been happy revolving my life on the fone, with you on the other line. Suddenly, I've been happier revolving my life around your lips, then to the whole of you. Those days, I know I'm just totally in-lust, but still I pretended that I love you and at that night, remember, we ended up in a commitment. That time I know I'm already walking away to my good Godly road. I chose you, for short. Oh well, that's lust. :/

For 1 week of commitment, commitment that I regret I vowed, we've been in a master-slave symbiotic relationship. You held me in my neck, suffocated till I can suffer no more. I quit.

I thought I wont regret, but 2 months of not seeing you made me scream "I miss you." That time I know this lustful fervor scraped deep in my heart, bloomed to something I'm not sure but love. I had gone partly mad. Crazy bout how to win you back. But I just cant, for someone has already won your heart.

But giving up has never been in my vocabulary. I dared to hang on my thinnest thread of chance to show my thin sheet of love. I hanged, I dangled, till I finally reached you. What hurts is I just reached you, but I never won you back. Were back on our old lustful ways. We play with our tongue in dark lights. Counting heartbeats of physical attraction.

I enjoy. I know. But this is not what I want. I really know that. It's you that I want, not your lips, not your body, not your face. It's only you. Just by hearing your voice, just by laughing on your unfunny jokes gives me this kind of happiness that I know it's not lust, and nothing is lustful in it. I give you what you want, what you need, I don't even mind the fact that I cant even give it to myself, as long as that serves a ticket for me to spend minutes of talk and staring your face.

You told me that its not just me whose playing in that commitment, for your playing too. It must be the most desperate line I said, but I said it with tears in my heart: Will you play with me again?

"I wont."

That's it. That broke me to pieces.

That must be the words that says, let's stay as fucking friends.

I will. I will. But I don't know how long could I stay. For the more I play with your body, the more this knife in my heart push deeper.

Lust as they say, but what I really want is to feel your love in your every kiss.

If I could just own you just like the way I own your lips every time we do it just for fun, I will make you feel happy and proud having me as your owner.

That's not a promise. That's a deal.

A Compliment for Markson E.

Surfing net is getting more boring and boring for me tonight. With only this half full glass of apple juice as my chum while waiting for the very slow download of Taylor Swift's Speak Now to finally succeed, I' am totally bored to death. Oh! I remember one thing...it's Markson birthday! Actually, I have already greeted him very early this morning, but there's something I would still want to do, not just for him but also for me, to ease this boredom that is surely a big sloth pain in the ass. haha..

Just for fun, I would like to write something for our birthday boy. A tribute... just a little slice of compliment.

I really don't know much about this guy, but I just wanna share what I know. I just wanna share the things that makes him different to any Markson surviving in this planet.

Before I set foot to the alleged(haha, weird term) Academic Paradise of the South, CMU, I already heard his name. My friend since highschool whose brother resided at Supremo's(boardinghouse where I stay) always nag about his name. She said that there is a cute nursing stud staying in Supremo's named Markson. In my mind, "Hell I care!", but I didn't said that so she kept on nagging about Markson. But I didn't found Markson there, then I just knew he moved to Boystown.

As to Ellen's description, I picture out Markson as a very handsome, masculine, and hot white cutie of College of Nursing. But he fell low to my expectations, I guess. Before the second sem started, my landlady told me that if I would now be open for a roommate, an exboarder named Markson would be my roommate. In my mind, Ellen would really be happy if she heard about this news! But my parents still decided that I would not have any roommate. Well that's okay for me, I'm more comfortable living alone in my room.

When I first saw Markson, my eyes started assessing: he is a short, moderately pimpled guy. He's quite good-looking but, ahem, quite different from the "Hercules-like" description of my friend. I'm really laughing at my room while I'm texting Ellen bout my assessment!

Days moved and I noticed more bout him. He's quite a big eater( as Ellen says), very neat, and, honest to say, but I really thought he's gay. I never had a talk to him for the first four months of us staying in the same roof. But in the last month, March, by the time-being alone, I just found myself talking to him. My first impression: He's kinda cool...not a bad thing if we would be friends.

Suddenly, my assessment changed. He's a guy who I could say kinda picky of friends, but he never turns one down, I believe. He's very nice to my boardmates, whom I find very annoying, and he makes time to have fun with them. He's very transparent as a friend. Like someone who wont be afraid to ask some favor, someone who wont turn down one, and someone who wont be afraid to be frank in front of you. For me, that's a kind of person whom I can say "REAL", not plastic in slang term, because for me, a true friend stabs you in front. He's someone who's eager to share what he have, though somehow he's bossy in a sense, but that isn't a big deal for me. Something I like bout him most, he always let us share with him his fone just to watch PGT.. As what my boardmates say, "Dili sha dalo"... I believe they're right!

As a brother to his sister, I know he's good! I remember he asked me: Carl, unsa kahay tsada na igift sacong manghod ba? Di man gud ko kauli sa iyang graduation. I'm not sure if it's graduation that he said, I cant remember it clearly, but that's the thought. For me, it shows that he really cares more than it shows. If I were him, saying sorry and congratulations to his younger sis would be enough for me. But to him, it shows that he's making it to the point that he could extend his love though he couldn't be there. That's something commendable.

And lastly, as a son, I find him quite good. I remember he shared me something bout his highschool experience about joining a gang. That's really terrible! But in the end, it shows that he respects his parents, though he said at that time he relied to his savings. haha.. And I know he calls his mom Ermat, that's a sign that he's really open to them. And openness is something not all children at teen-hood could assure their parents.

And earlier this morning, we had a short exchange of text messages. I asked him if he already went home then he said he still couldn't. I asked him, for sure you miss your mom now.. he answered "Sobra pa sa mingaw"...That's the time I felt I'm still lucky enough for I had spent Mother's day with my mom but a boy who really loves his mom like Markson simply couldn't.

In totality, for me, he's a fabulous guy. A great, open friend, a caring brother, and a loving son. For sure a friend like him deserves an article of compliment like this.

Personally, I really find him as more than a good friend. He's a "better friend", if that term exists, LOL.. =) That's why just like any other close friends of mine, I waited for 12 am to strike the clock and made it sure to greet him a happy birthday in 12 am sharp. I even tried to called but he's asleep already, then I just smiled for I just want to tell that Ellen would want to extend her greetings through me. She keeps on reminding me that.. haha!

To my dear friend Markson, our God has chose to give you another year to spread more love and plow greener pastures. This year is another roller coaster of smiles and tears, rejoice and disappointment. But there's one thing I just wanna tell you: in this another revolution trip of yours around the sun, don't forget to soar high but kneel to pray, and just keep on ROCKIN'!

My glass of apple juice is now empty, and finally, the download succeed. And shall I say, GOODNIGHT!

Where does that love comes from, Mom?

How did you find the energy, Mom
To do all the things you did,
To be teacher, nurse and counselor
To me, when I was a kid.

It's mother's day again, and the whole world is celebrating, like me. Some of my friends in Facebook changed their profile picture with the picture of their mom while others even made a slideshow just to pay tribute the the woman who brought forth their lives; and not just that, for she's also the woman who chose to suffer and sacrifice all that's needed to just to raise us---the wild, rebellious, ungrateful, and insolent us.

I' am Carl Ace, and I'm honest to say that I really haven't reciprocated enough the love of my mom that she's been unceasingly giving to me each day. When my mom was still in college, she is so beautiful and a CMU College of Engineering certified "it" girl. But God's plan it is, she married my dad early, and yah, had me early. She missed everything fabulous that a college diploma promises, but I never heard her regret---that's why I know she do love me, not just because I' am hers, but she loves me coz I' am me.

I really wonder where in the world did my mom got the reason for loving me this too long. You know, dogs, they just take care with their puppies for few month then after that, the bitch would just even snob their pups before and some even fuck their own product. Oh I know you know that's not my point but my point is my mom, just like any other mom, could have chose to abort me...or raise me til I'm a toddler then just throw me near a trashcan in a busy city street, like the greasy orphans outside Jollibee. With my very stubborn and sour attitude, if I were my mom, I would not hesitate to flush the cute little young Carl Ace in the toilet.

But my mom never did that. She has been patient for all this time and been a mother for me for all these years. I guess that's the fact that separates her from our pet bitches, and to the bitches who were regular costumers of Mrs. Abortionist.

How did you do it all, Mom,
Be a chauffeur, cook and friend,
Yet find time to be a playmate,
I just can’t comprehend.

My mom is an undergad, but I never felt she was. You know, she's a doctor to me when I'm sick. My soldier when my dad spanks me. My teacher when I was still young. and the best of all, my friend, every time I need one.

She wakes up early every morning to cook my breakfast before I get to school. I believe even my mother would also wish to have a long, beautiful sleep like us but she waives her self interest every morning for me. I even heard some of my friends saying that their mom don't do that for them. They have to cook for their selves as well us they have to wash their own clothes, iron, and fold it. My mom didn't even tasked me to do that.

I have read something from Ramayana, saying जननी जन्मभूमिश्च स्वर्गादपि गरीयसी, this means: the mother is higher than the motherland... even higher than heaven. Of course my mom couldn't give me the things that God in heaven promises but she continuously defy her limits, do everything to provide me my needs, and exhaust her self to give me comfort. That ain't easy, Amen?

I see now it was love, Mom
That made you come whenever I'd call,
Your inexhaustible love, Mom
And I thank you for it all.

The reason why she keeps on forgiving my flaws, why she spends most of her money not only for my needs but also for my luxury, and why she age faster coz of me is LOVE. The great motherly love.

As what I said, she don't love me for I' am from her and I' am hers. She loves me for I' am Carl Ace; once the baby who almost took her life while she's giving me life; once the child who deprived her her wants just to admit my fragile body to the hospital almost every month; once the kid who she protects every time my dad couldn't be patient to my faults anymore; once the youngster who she assisted as I' am changing from a kid to a teen; and now the teen who force her to slave herself to work every moment of her life in order to grant me the very expensive key to my dreams; and always will be the CARL ACE who made her tears fall as my first cry was heard; and the first reason why she has to hold on to the vow she exchanged with with my dad.

I admit she isn't perfect. She couldnt afford all my wants, and sometimes, she fails to understand what's within my mind that I' am afraid to speak, but there's something that would always forget me my disappointments towards her, and that's the fact that she never fails to express to me not just through words but also through actions that one eternal and ever evolving-consummate-unadulterated-basic-essential-crucial-necessary-affectionate emotion called mother's love.


To my mom, I love you though your text messages to me are all in capital letters and lacks period every time, though you always ask stupid and nonsense questions to me, though you always cut my dreams every morning, and though you always murmur same lines every time I ask for new jeans and my allowance. Simply because, I'm nowhere to be find without you.. I love you mom!

(poem: Everything Mom by Joanna Fuchs)

Summertime Blues...byebye!

Summertime, for me, as a student, is so boring. At least now I feel a little bit eased after hearing a line from a country song saying : Yeah theres ain't no cure for this summertime blues(did i rephrase it right? I doubt)....Yeah, knowing that I'm not the only one feeling this gross thing in this season of fun is a cure...Somehow..

Oh well oh well...Summer is not generally a season for beaches and summer flings(According to a poor and ugly person..hey that's not me!), it's also a season to discover yourself more, to revive your buried golden past, and to develop and prepare your self for another 10 months hurdle to face; for short, its a quite long season to grow(that's from a cute teen who thinks more than he speaks, that's me :3)

As a student, summer really sucks for me.. Why oh why? No CLASSES, No ALLOWANCE. Then following there is a long long train of No's...such as no food trips, no movies, no swimming, no fun and blahblahblah...See how important allowance is for a student?

But actually, after I worshiped with my friends, jumped the wall that coves the falls, climbed the cliff that assures death for a wrong step, and pacified my crying soul because of this unbearable muscle pain all over my body, and just right before I write this next word, I had this moment of realization: fun is always there, what you only need to do is have the courage to open your door and go outside.

For short, now is still the last week of April, but yes, I had a lot of summer (hehe, thats not short though).

The last week of March has been hard for me. IT HURTS! that's the loudest avowal that my soul was longing to scream. You know, before the school days halted, I could already foresee a great summer coming for me. I'm going to invite all of my friends in my birthday in April 4; I will attend in International Leaders Conference in Cagayan de Oro City in April 15; I will spend my holy week and the rest of April in Bohol; and many many more "will's". That's quite exciting, I commend. But everything nice under the sun went far worse than topsy-turvy --okay you got it, I'm exaggerating it-- but yeah, no single plan came to existence.

My parents didn't let me invite my friends in my birthday. I forgot about ILC and childishly spent all my money at Kaamulan Festival and the days that followed. And because I spent all my bucks on my piggy, I don't have any peso left for Bohol.. (ohhhh..so sad).

Though something wicked turned my summer wicked, it still turns out to be a quiet good summer. In a rate of ten stars as the highest, I rate my summer 7.5 (is there a half star? haha).

In my own assessment, I could give you tips on how to enjoy summer when everything turned hellish(yeah..) through my own experiences.

*1: Dig your friends.

I remember a song of the Girls Scout of the Philippines that somehow speaks newly found friends are like silver..but those old ones are like gold. I dug my golds in our place, and fortunately, I still recovered some. Its fun going outdoors with your childhood friends! You relive your past memories, and you even get the right to brag about your funniest and strangest moments in your youth. Your old friends has something good that your new friends don't have. You can be real to them and you can say bad words to them. I tell you, all of you will just laugh in the end.

*2: Discover your place as you discover yourself.

My place, dubbed as "Diamond in Rough", is a virgin paradise that you can relish exclusively. In my 16 years of existence, I really believe that this barangay that i live in possess only 3 beautiful waterfalls. Its just now, in my 17th year that I discovered that there is a shorter waterfalls kept in the least visited part of the jungle: The Macabayot Falls. Its height is just enough for a weakling's heart to conquer. But its strong rush water and the sure-kill rapids beneath could make a brave heart to think twice. It has the strongest water current among all the waterfalls here because the water flowing from Natigbasan Falls unites with the water of Gantungan Falls, and these massive water is the water that travels through the Macabayot Falls. I believe it got its name by the thrill that it serves to visitors. Macabayot means "could make you GAY".

*3: Feed your soul.

This season of boredom and emptiness gives you one thing that you cant find in the rest of the year: TIME. In the Lenten season, I had the time to eternalized the "Seven Last Words". With my Youth for Christ family, I experienced a new way of praying, Taizé. It is said to start in France, and this way of praying is really great.

Theres much more ways to enjoy your summer though your pockets are empty. After all, like any other seasons, the philosophy behind the fun in summer is just the same. Open your door, go out, and see what the world could give you. Then enjoy it. There is an unlimited options you could get, the only thing that limits is the wideness that you chose when you opened your door.

Have a beautiful summer!